UCD Hardcore Championship

To win the UCD Hardcore championship, you should, in theory, have to be the most vile, inhuman viscious hacker on the team, able to injure players with a single glare, get sent off because you felt that their right-back needed a good thump and torture small, defenseless creatures in your spare time. Unfortunately, two things stand in the way of our goal. Firstly, we base our system on red and yellow cards received, which leaves us very much at the whim of eircom League referees. Secondly, we win the bloody Fair Play award every damned year.

Then, we had a cunning plan; a plan so cunning that it just might have been devised by a fox recently appointed Professor of Cunning at UCD. First, we allow for the daftness of referees by discounting cards awarded for diving or other such un-hardcorelike gamesmanship and by giving random bonus points whereever we see fit. Secondly, and more fortunately this time, we have always had one player who has tried to get us to not win the Fair Play award on his own. Not by pursuasion, no - by bone-crunching tackles, breathing fire and requiring he be wheeled onto the pitch for each match (except the League Cup, because no one cares) in a getup remniscient of a certain Mr. Lector.

Scoring system:

• 1 point per yellow card
• 2 points per red card
• -1 point for each yellow received for whining at the ref for gross incompetence.
• 1 bonus point if the action leading to the card killed an opposing player.
• -3 points for Mick O’Donnell, just to make it fair. Yes, we know he doesn’t play for us any more. It doesn’t matter - the man’s a monster.
• Half points only for the League Cup because nobody cares.
• Any other points we see fit or humourous along the way.

Roll of Honour

• 2006 - Gary Dicker (we think. It kind of lost its lustre after Micko retired undefeated)
• 2005 - Mick O’Donnell
• 2004 - Mick O’Donnell
• 2003 - Mick O’Donnell
• 2002/2003 - Robbie Doyle
• 2001/2002 - Richie Purdy
• Beginning of time to 2000 - Éamon McLaughlin